Like a lot of millennials, I was saddened to hear about Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth's shock split earlier this year. From their meeting on The Last Song to their break up then make up then secret wedding, I thought they were endgame. And judging by the public reaction, I wasn't alone.
Any feelings of sadness that I had however quickly turned into anger when I saw the disparity in support for Liam and Miley post-breakup.
Liam, 29, was painted as a wounded puppy, with fans and followers voicing their concern, commenting in their thousands to tell him he 'could do so much better', with some even apologising that he was having to deal with 'the Miley drama'.
The support for 26-year-old Miley couldn't be any more different, with the words 'crazy', 'slut' and 'disrespectful' appearing to be the most common terms thrown at her.
Let's just remember that we still don't know what happened, so that finger-pointing is based solely on the fact that Liam has kept a low profile post-split while Miley has started publicly dating again, associated with Kaitlynn Carter and now Cody Simpson.
So yes, to reiterate - Liam Hemsworth is being encouraged to move on while Miley Cyrus is getting shamed for moving on.
The gender double standard around rebound relationships has always been eye-watering, but few have called it out until now.
Taking to her Twitter, Miley condensed her thoughts into four succinct points - and they are extremely powerful.
'1. I know the public feels invested in my past relationship because they felt like they saw it thru from the beginning… I think that’s why people have always felt so entitled over my life and how I live it because they’ve watched me grow up… but I am grown now and make choices as an adult knowing the truth/ details/ reality. People only “know” what they see on the internet.
'2. Men (especially the successful ones) are RARELY slut shamed. They move on from one beautiful woman to the next MOST times without consequence. They are usually referred to as “legends”, “heart throbs”, “G”, “Ladies Man” etc… where women are called sluts/ whores! I am trying to just THRIVE/ survive in a “mans” world… if we can’t beat em, join em! If our president can “grab em by the pussy…” can’t I just have a kiss and acai bowl?!?!
'3. I refuse to recluse and “date” from home cause A. That’s not fun B. Extremely uncomfortable/ puts me in a vulnerable position… I would like to share an activity with someone I am dating and not be stuck at home with pretty much nothing to do but “Netflix and chill”
'4. This “dating” thing is new to me too. I’ve never been an “adult” / grown ass woman experiencing this … I was in a committed relationship for almost All my teens and early 20s ; with the exception of a few breaks, which usually in those times I was working my ass off with not much R&R… and “meeting/ trusting” people in my position is really tuff. I have a great life I wouldn’t trade for “privacy” but PLEASE don’t make this awkward for me! I am trying to make light and like always MAKE FUN of myself/ and the public’s perception of me! Get used to me dating - this is where I am at! #HotGirlFall'
Miley's words may be important, but my problem is the fact that they were necessary in the first place.
Would she have been labelled as 'crazy' if she were a man, moving on and having fun after a stressful break up? Would Liam have received the blame had he been a woman? And why does there need to be blame in the first place?
It's 2019 people and there is simply no excuse for gender double standards.
