Who Even Are You? This Is What Your Morning Toast Says About You

Open the window to your soul

Forget Myers Briggs, horoscopes, or what you dream, surely the only way to determine who you are, or what the person you want to settle down with is really like, is to look at your toast. And it’s not just us who thinks so…

According to food psychologist Dr. Christy Fergusson, toast holds the key to finding out about all your personalities.

Speaking to The Sun, Dr. Fergusson revealed that how you cook your toast can indicate how patient you are, motivated and spontaneous.

Here’s a highly scientific toast chart to illustrate different shades*.

**We’re totally 6E covered in marmite.

For instance, if you like it burnt to a crisp, like 8I, you’ve got tonnes of patience and don’t mind biding your time in the mornings. (We’d love to meet anyone who actually has the time to set aside to burn their toast every morning.) However there are also dangerous chemicals in burnt toast, so your probably not very health conscious either. Also anyone think burnt toast is extremely messy and difficult to get out your teeth? Asking for a friend, here.

Due to the bitter taste of burnt toast, you’re also likely to be more judgemental of others and critical of yourself.

If you like yours golden brown and Instagram ready, you’re likely to be motivated by appearances, and really care what others think of you. You’re also efficient and tidy and strive for a high standard - kind of like the Mary Poppins of toast.

And if you’re one of those baffling types who’s toast is no more than lightly crisped bread, then you’re likely to be impatient, spontaneous, and constantly racing around.

Because you’re always so busy you feel easily overwhelmed and the soft texture of the toast helps you feel comforted. Aw didums.

So there you have it, the key to who you really are. Now stop the soul searching and make us some tea and toast. Thanks pet.