10 things you only know if you work in retail

Working in retail takes diligence, it take self-sacrifice... and it takes a whole lot of patience when handling those seriously annoying customers.

Working in retail takes diligence, it take self-sacrifice... and it takes a whole lot of patience when handling those seriously annoying customers.

When someone takes the pair of jeans from the middle of the pile… Well, you feel so angry that you could really just set the whole place on fire. You probably won’t, but you definitely could. It took forever to fold that pyramid of basics and sub-20 seconds for a customer to ruin it.

The customer is always right …Except when they’re really, really wrong. Which is most of the time. That voucher says it expired in January, madam, and it’s now August. Don't even try it.

What was a weekend? You can’t actually remember. Nor can you make any plans beyond next week because you just don’t know what the shift pattern Gods will have in store. 

'Do you work here?'  Your least favourite question. Like anyone would ever be hanging around in the store uniform, finger-spacing hangers, just for LOLs.

Add-on sales targets are ridiculous  We’re looking at you, WHSmith. But hats off to their employees for managing to be so enthusiastic when presenting their ‘any of these items for £1?’ selection for the 76th time in a single morning.

Dumpers are bad people Don’t you just love it when people change their mind about an item and put it back anywhere. Like when you find a lipstick in the occasionwear department or Fish Fingers melting amongst the Monster Munch.

Songs you used to love now hurt your ears Music on a loop. Music on a loop. Music on a loop.

Your uniform allowance is a con You’re really being asked to pay 60% of price of a dress that isn’t your style and that you will never wear outside of work because you’ve stared at it all day, everyday. Oh and that cost is coming straight out of your wage packet and going back to your employer. Ace.

Christmas is no longer the most wonderful time of year In fact it’s the worst. The build up from October, the Christmas eve panic shoppers, the Boxing Day sales chaos. The worst. 

You truly are ‘sorry about that’ Something’s out of stock, someone’s card is declined, someone missed their returns deadline by 60 seconds. You just can’t look at another heartbroken face in the way that this job makes you do so regularly. Maybe it's time to look for something in an office?