What.
No matter how much time passes since Severus Snape's death, we're still not over it.
Okay, Snape was presented to us as a baddie for a good while before J.K. Rowling decided to throw that whole 'he's-been-secretly-good-this-whole-time' curveball on us. But knowing that he had actually been protecting Harry Potter meant that his death was heartbreaking.
Various Harry Potter theories have circulated on the internet for years, ranging from the bizarre (ahem, this tribute to Rupert Grint) to the downright mind-blowing (we're looking for you Aunt Petunia). However, it's this little nugget of conspiracy theory gold that has us shook.
Are you ready?
What if Snape didn't actually die? Would you laugh? Cry? Grab us by the collar and demand answers?
Well one Reddit user has a theory about the non-deceased state of Harry's Potions professor, and it's a good'un. According to Der_Gottkaiser, Snape is alive and kicking.
Here's the evidence.
Exhibit one: Snape doesn't appear when Harry tries to summon him with the resurrection stone
'You'd think Snape was very important to Harry, he loved his mother, gave his life to save him, and shielded him all his life,' the theorist starts.
'Harry just found out how Snape had been protecting him the whole time and died to save him, so when he used the magic ring that brings the spirits of dead people, you'd think Snape would be here.
'He certainly knew Snape longer than Lupin, and you'd think Snape was far more important to him than Lupin, but Snape wasn't around. Perhaps he was not dead.'
Is this enough to convince you? Perhaps Snape was busy playing hide and seek with Dumbledore in those big, white corridors? Maybe he just couldn't be bothered.
Exhibit two: Where's Snape's body after the Battle of Hogwarts?
'After the big battle, they lay out all the bodies, all the people who died, even the death eaters and Voldemort's. Harry sees Lupin and Fred's body, but Snape's body isn't there,' the Reddit user muses.
'You'd think Harry would have told everyone about Snape's sacrifice so they can find his body too. But nope, Snape's corpse isn't found.'
Erm - maybe they didn't find it until later on? That's all we've got.
Exhibit three: Why couldn't a Potions Professor save himself from Nagini's snake fang poison?
'Just think about it, do you really think a POTIONS MASTER wouldn't have access to anti-venom?' the theory goes.
'You think he wouldn't have prepared for the possibility that Voldemort's snake might turn on him? He was playing a dangerous role as a spy, Voldemort could turn on him at any moment. I think Snape would have obviously taken some kind of prophylactic antidote beforehand.'
Okay, we've got nothing here. Reddit user Der_Gottkaiser, you've successful blown our minds/won the internet/given us a million questions about where Snape is secretly hiding.
